The burning of uncertainty …

Shall I or shan’t I ? ….

How many times that phrase has crossed my mind. I wish sometimes I wouldn’t think so deeply about everything….sometimes I wish I would ‘hang the consequences’, proverbially put on my Nike trainers and ‘Just Do It’.

But it’s the consequences of decisions that often scare me….I know the choice I make could alter my life for the worst so rather than take immediate action I sit and ponder. Thinking gives me time to invariably realise that on the other hand I may experience the consequence and it may not be so bad after all (does that mean I am an closet optimist or just a failing pessimist?).

It is there in that thinking time, in that difficult period before the choice is made, in my burning of uncertainty where I dwell longest but eventually I know I have to act because not making a choice, choosing not to do something, say something or not to write something, is a choice in itself but one where forever there is a question raised. One forever where someone else is in control of my destiny.

Theodore Roosevelt summed it up nicely…“In any moment of decision the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.”

So I act and then invariably spend the next minute/hour/day panicking as to whether I’ve done the right thing – the pessimist in me definitely takes over.

It’s bad enough to be in this type of dilemma when you are the only person it affects but  those consequences often reach further, invariably the consequence of my action also involves others and what may be right for me may not be right for them – why is life so complex ? Sometimes because my decision affects others as well my action chooses to a degree their destiny and how fair is that ? Perhaps that’s my issue…I believe sometimes to my own detriment I care about other people too much, my dilemma is heightened by what effect it will have on them.

The hardest thing for me truly is when my decision involves others because it is then that the burning of uncertainty within me grows to a raging firestorm.

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About Rob

If you want to know more about what goes on in the chemical soup that I call a brain then have a trawl through my blog where my life to a degree is unveiled. Enjoy my life - I'm trying to. Rob
This entry was posted in My Ramblings and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to The burning of uncertainty …

  1. jmgoyder says:

    Oh I so understand this!

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