Jumper Outerers

Aaaaaaaargh !

Not the best thing to experience in the world, a moment of sheer terror but like all real non-threatening things eventually you can relax and laugh at the incident – well unless your pacemaker gives up the ghost (pardon the pun).

I think I may have found the perfect job…a job that doesn’t involve any skill as such just the harbouring of a secret desire to scare the complete bejesus out of someone.

I’m sure there are many towns and cities that promote Ghost Tours but only in Edinburgh have I come across one that actually doesn’t just have a tour guide to provide the spine tingling commentary, it has other members who in their own unique way spice up the event.

The tours take place during the hours of darkness and wind their way through the various alleyways of the old town. Already claustrophobic and scary places during the hours of daylight these alleys take on a completely menacing almost terrifying persona at night.

It is at the junctions and doorways of these dark foreboding alleyways that the Jumper Outerer’s await the unsuspecting members of the tour.  As the crowd passes by a ‘target’ is selected and as the opportune moment presents itself the ‘jumper outerer’  leaps out of the darkness with a cry, “BOO !”

Well it is advertised as a Ghost Tour and is supposed to scare you.

If successful in my application, knowing my luck I would though at some point select the wrong person and jump out only to find myself slightly later in hospital, arms and legs in traction.

I would be the unlucky one, the unlucky jumper outerer who chose the closet ninja – the unassuming lady who just happened to have attended martial-art classes as a means of self defence. The lady, who being presented with me jumping out of a doorway, calmly and without a second thought would grab me and throw me backwards from where I came before beating her would be assailant (me !) half to death Kendo style with her umbrella.

Perhaps on this reflection it’s not the job for me after all !

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About Rob

If you want to know more about what goes on in the chemical soup that I call a brain then have a trawl through my blog where my life to a degree is unveiled. Enjoy my life - I'm trying to. Rob
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